I’ve been on the giving end plenty of times and the receiving end once or twice in the past and as such I feel like I’m a fairly good authority on the subject. There are two main misconceptions that everyone has about it and I’m here to clear them up for anyone who’s interested.
Firstly, people seem to think it makes you a bad person and here’s the groundbreaking discovery, it doesn’t. The majority of people have done it, whether other people find out or not. It’s a byproduct of an inability to talk to your significant other and realistically, that in itself signals a bigger problem. If the relationship has broken down to such a point that one person doesn’t want to be with the other but can’t open up to them enough to actually tell them that well then let’s face it, what does it matter if they cheated? The relationship was dead in the water anyway.
Secondly, I find this one is more prevalent in women than men but a lot of people seem to blame themselves for their partner cheating or somehow rationalize that they must have done something wrong to make it happen. There’s no need to blame yourself, at least no more than you would if your partner simply broke up with you. That’s all they’re really doing, it’s just a desperate and not particularly nice way to give you the signal that it’s game over.
So, if you’re worried about your partner cheating on you then just stop and think for a second. If the relationship’s that fucked that they’re pretty close to doing it then either recognise how shit things are and talk to them about it, or just jump ship. You don’t have to stalk and spy on people and push them further into doing what you’re afraid of, just talk or leave. It’s a simple choice when it comes down to it.
And it went off without a hitch. I agreed to go on too many dates during the time I was home but somehow, one of them bailed and one asked to meet up tonight before I left for Swansea instead of yesterday, so it actually all ended up perfectly! And somehow, with all of the things that I did, all the people i hung out with and all of the alcohol I consumed, I now find myself back in Swansea with 4050 words of a 5000 word assignment done, so this’ll be easily finished by 3am, and then it’s off to bed ready to tackle tomorrow!
This is the last update on this topic for a little while now, I wasn’t going to do this many but I guess I got overexcited. From now on they’ll just be a weekly rundown. I look forward to having more to write about in the coming days.
So, here we are again. It’s been two years and three months since I first started this and I’ve barely done it at all for the last eighteen months so it’s about time I change that. I’ve recently been broken up with but I suppose for a good reason at least. There’s no hatred, no bad intention and no anger at all really. The situation itself is simply that two people want different things and have different values, that’s not something to hate someone for really that’s just an unfortunate result of life. It seems strange to explain but that’s just the way it is and there’s nothing I or anyone else can do about it. I’m a twenty-two year old person who needs to focus his attention on himself as opposed to a partner for the first time in his life, I’ll stay as I am and instead of spending time trying to be what someone wants me to be and do what will make them happy, I’ll be selfish and look after myself for a change. It’ll be interesting to see where this’ll take me.
I’ve been destroying everything that makes me happy or that I love and for no other reason than apparently I just can’t let myself be happy. I fell in love with a girl and we broke up because she loved me so much that she hated the thought of losing me or me getting interested in other girls and became incredibly paranoid and jealous and wouldn’t let me do much without her either being upset or having a go at me. She says she’s changed and I just don’t think she has, I can’t believe that she has because it doesn’t seem like it’s possible for her to. I really want to be with her because I know she’s what makes me happy, but I need that bit of trust and for her to have faith in us. I’m torn between risking being with a girl I love who might not be able to let our relationship work at all or being in love with a girl who’s going to get over me while I try to make the best of whatever I’ve got left. Who the fuck knows what I’m supposed to do, I certainly don’t.
Which of these three options is true. I’m either allergic to being happy, mentally unstable or just fucking stupid. I’ve got something that means more to me than anything else ever has and for some reason my brain just won’t let the rest of me be happy. It could be the result of years of drug abuse, it could just be what love really does to people. Whatever the reason is, It’s killing me.
Of course it is, it always will be, at least until you’ve got everything you want. I’d say I’m pretty close for the first time in my life and I know the road’s been rocky and it’s going to continue to be but in the end, I’m going to look back on all of this and think about how lucky I was that I never gave up. Basically, do everything you can to get everything you’ve ever wanted. You’ll never regret it. Let’s get the weatherman to do a re-take because it seems like blue skies are due again.